Phase 3, Day 18: Eating to Live

Weight: 229.0 pounds
Total Weight Lost: 45.6 pounds

After an amazing weekend playing in the snow and getting Christmas decorations up (ok, so the tree and window candles are done), I was walking through the grocery store today when a I had an epiphany. The words aren't original, but the impact was VERY real.

"Eat to live, don't live to eat."

I think I may have even used this quote in a post back at the beginning of my Somae journey, but today it really hit home. I was trying to mentally plan my menu for the week (another great change over the last 11 weeks), and was looking back over what I have eaten the last several days. Not a lot--well, at least not in comparison to what I used to eat. Spinach (my new favorite leafy green), apples and oranges, raw sunflower seeds and organic peanut butter, some lean steak and chicken, some herbal tea and water to drink. Tons of nutrient-dense foods WITHOUT A SINGLE ARTIFICIAL INGREDIENT. DO I still have urges to eat other things. Sure, but they aren't the overwhelming need to eat them.

I have learned over the last 11 weeks that if (and rather, when) I do have something "off protocol" or "less than healthy" with high fat, sugar or salt content...I AM GOING TO IMMEDIATELY WANT MORE. Sneak a pinch of cookie dough over my wife's shoulder while she's baking? I become the cookie monster. Grab a couple of crackers out of the box as I'm arranging a snack tray for a holiday party? I can immediately see myself sitting in front of the television eating an entire box.

Food is comforting. There is a reason why many of the top food manufacturers have chemical engineers on their R&D staff. Those three ingredients--fat, salt and sugar--create a chemical response in our bodies that translates into an emotional one. Finding the right balance between the three is what keeps us coming back to products that claim you "can't eat just one". Well, DUH! You don't want me to eat just one or else you wouldn't make as much money.

I'm currently almost 46 pounds lighter than when I started this program, and about 57 pounds lighter from my heaviest weight 6 or 7 months ago. I am eating just a fraction of the calories of what I was eating at that point, but feel so much more satisfied when I recognize that

• I'm not starving,
• I have more energy than I have had in years,
• My level of concentration is better than it has been in years,
• I'VE LOST 46 POUNDS,
and most importantly,

• I'm living my life, not the life of someone who I never wanted to become.